Ten minutes passed and the feeling only intensified. I kept thinking to myself, that I should have gone to the bathroom before we left, but I hadn’t thought to do so. Besides, isn’t it a parent’s responsibility to remind their kids to go potty, before leaving the house?

Fifteen more minutes went by and my stomach was cramping so bad that I knew there was no way I could hold it much longer.

I saw a sign that read ‘Rest Area – 2 Miles’.

“There’s a rest stop, John! Please can we please stop?” I implored.

“Oh, fine then!” John surrendered while impatiently thumping the wheel with his thumbs.

We passed the sign that read, ‘Rest Area – Next Right’ and that’s when it happened. I’m talking about an explosion that would have rivaled the Big Bang, which gave birth to the universe. Yeah that’s right; I just created a whole new universe in the back of my diaper! Who’s to say that isn’t how our universe was created? Maybe some ancient being took a gigundous dump into his or her diaper and that’s how we all came to be. When my butt cheeks parted, to give way to the pressures within my bowls, it was so loud and so powerful, that I swear it felt as though I was lifted off the backseat seat. And if I hadn’t been wearing my seatbelt, I probably would have been blasted right through the car roof.

“Oh!” John said with a blasting laugh, “You know that had to hurt!”

“Oh son of a…” I started to cuss, but was cut off by Mom.

Her head quickly snapped around and she shouted, “Alvin Colton Holloway! Don’t you dare use that kind of language or so help me.”